The only currency on the entire planet is dopamine

[David]

I found this talk absolutely fascinating about the latest insights with neuroscience. Halfway through the talk they start talking about dopamine and its role in anticipation as opposed to reward which is how it’s often refer to. It’s lengthy but if you’re into this stuff worth a listen

[L-F]

One thing about Jordan that I don't like is that he overcomplicates things. He tends to avoid layman's terms. Huberman was easy to understand.

Limerance in my opinion is 100% anticipatory. Will s/he or they:
like this _____, (dress, perfume, artwork, muscles, thesis, etc)
see me,
acknowledge me...

And as mentioned, anticipation drives one forward (keeps one limerent?).

The outcome may or may not bring a reward. IMHO. And even if it does bring a reward, it's not as spectacular as one thinks it would be. That's why fantasy is more potent than reality. Reality bursts the fantasy bubble and hence marriage kills any degree of limerence.

So the moral of the story is if you want to kill limerence, marry your LO. Just keep in mind it doesn't cure limerence because marriage doesn't address the root cause. If the root cause remains, you'll likely find someone else to fall limerent for. And thus... we have those who repeatedly have affairs whether emotional and/or physical.

[David]

I enjoy Peterson’s intellectual acumen, that said I was discussing him with my wife and we both felt that he still carries a lot of trauma in the way that he gets triggered. He also is so serious and rarely shows much humour. It will be nice to see him develop more of his lighter side.

That said he has done much to promote psychology and there is no doubting that he has a brilliant mind even if he does over- complicate things. I’ve always felt the people that make things complicated by doing that as a psychological defence. I pointed this out during my therapy training when reading academic papers where often the authors were using words that were totally incomprehensible to me and why did they feel the need to do this? Why were they hiding behind their intellectualism?

As for marrying our LO, been there seen that done that and you are right it doesn’t cure us of the trauma that drives Limerence

[L-F]

Without a doubt he has a brilliant mind. Agree, intellectualisation can be a defense mechanism employed to protect the ego. One of my professors told me, if you can't explain a difficult subject in simple language then you really don't know your subject.

[Zsababy]

I've heard the anticipatory connection before and am reminded of what my friend use to say about both shopping & romance: wanting is better than having. He would jokingly use the word "covet" as it's dramatic, but he was right on the money. I was notoriously obsessive back then (as today) and made my fixations known (now I try to avoid annoying people with it as it gets very tiresome).
Fantasy is a helluva drug

[peter.rabbit]

Fantasy is a helluva drug

People don't understand reality until they understand the impact that dopamine addiction has on their view of...everything.