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Do we disable PM's?

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Shall we remove the PM facility? You can revoite if you change your views after reading comments.

Yes
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No
19
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Total votes: 19

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David
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Do we disable PM's?

Post by David » Mon Oct 07, 2019 11:15 am

Given the recent threads about possible grooming via PM do we shut off this facility?

Personally i have had some good off forum conversations, met up with a couple of people in person and see value in the facility.

I can also see how things can develop for people earlier on their journey into inappropriate relationships and in some cases appropriate relationships where both parties are unattached.

Anyhow a poll is in place and comments are sought.
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daydreamer
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Re: Do we disable PM's?

Post by daydreamer » Mon Oct 07, 2019 1:54 pm

IMHO, PM is basically like a stranger on the street reaching out to you and asking you a question. most of the time, they are honest harmless people and sometimes, they are conman. out in the street you would not trust a stranger and neither you should here, in PM or not.

the difference on the forum is, on one hand, we tend to be vulnerable here. but on the other hand, one can always check the history of a poster. when did he/she register, what did he/she did while on the forum, etc.
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Re: Do we disable PM's?

Post by Maddie » Mon Oct 07, 2019 2:28 pm

David wrote:
Mon Oct 07, 2019 11:15 am

Personally i have had some good off forum conversations, met up with a couple of people in person and see value in the facility.
I agree with the above comment. I feel that I've made a couple of friends on here that I am able to communicate with via PM. I trust my own judgment regarding who I message, or who I share personal info with.
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JohnDeux
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Re: Do we disable PM's?

Post by JohnDeux » Mon Oct 07, 2019 2:46 pm

As a long time member of this forum and the previous Tribe-LE, I agree with the previous posts that PMs are a valuable resource for Q&A that can augment the discussions on the open forum. As noted, the power in that more private venue can be abused....especially with the vulnerable state that most are in when making the decision to join as a member. What I've seen done on other forums to at least try to help in this regard is a repeating post that appears every few months reminding/encouraging members that misuse of the forum is not tolerated and that such activity should be *reported immediately* to the site administrator(s). I'm not sure how such a repeating post is set-up, but on other forums it seems to appear at the beginning of the month, so perhaps is automatically generated by the system. Anyway, my vote being not to disable PMs for reasons noted.
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David
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Re: Do we disable PM's?

Post by David » Mon Oct 07, 2019 6:48 pm

JohnDeux wrote:
Mon Oct 07, 2019 2:46 pm
What I've seen done on other forums to at least try to help in this regard is a repeating post that appears every few months reminding/encouraging members that misuse of the forum is not tolerated and that such activity should be *reported immediately* to the site administrator(s).
ive made my post about beware of groomers a global announcement so it should stay at the top, i cant see any extensions that allow for a post to be resent on a recurring basis
"Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate." - C.G. Jung

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Idiotic
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Re: Do we disable PM's?

Post by Idiotic » Mon Oct 07, 2019 7:43 pm

David wrote:
Mon Oct 07, 2019 6:48 pm
JohnDeux wrote:
Mon Oct 07, 2019 2:46 pm
What I've seen done on other forums to at least try to help in this regard is a repeating post that appears every few months reminding/encouraging members that misuse of the forum is not tolerated and that such activity should be *reported immediately* to the site administrator(s).
ive made my post about beware of groomers a global announcement so it should stay at the top, i cant see any extensions that allow for a post to be resent on a recurring basis
Let's make it a sticky then? I don't know how to though.
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Re: Do we disable PM's?

Post by AMA210 » Mon Oct 07, 2019 10:31 pm

I have used and still use PM.

Although, even though some of us are in a very vunerable state, I think it should be up to the person using the PM feature in whether or not it's becoming an issue for them personally. In my experience, it became a part of the learning process for me. For example, reasons why I gravitate towards unavailable men.

Having it be a global announcement was a good idea, as it's making people aware of what may possibly occur within the PM feature.
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