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I've officially transferred

Open forum ... what's on your mind? Want to vent or lament about your Limerent/Love Object? This is the ideal place.
Yesnomaybeso
Posts: 73
Joined: Tue Dec 18, 2018 12:11 pm
Gender:
Age: 28
Australia

I've officially transferred

Post by Yesnomaybeso » Thu Jul 11, 2019 3:26 am

Wow just wow. Finally getting somewhere and boom. I don't even know them irl. Someone who lives over the other side of the world. The only difference... they actually feel the same. Just a word of advice. Being self aware isn't enough. I had that... and look at me. I feel love.. different to the other LE yet I know it's just projections.. both of us. I want to save them I want to move to be with them. It's all bullshit yet I feel it. I need to separate again. It's codependency at its finest. Another wounded soul I'm attracted too. Another way to not have to focus on my own issues. This just sucks.

daydreamer
Posts: 697
Joined: Wed Nov 07, 2018 5:44 pm
Gender:
United States of America

Re: I've officially transferred

Post by daydreamer » Thu Jul 11, 2019 4:34 am

wow! indeed. i see that tendency in myself too. i posted about it recently, knowing about it does not make you immune. at least i was able to see it very early on before it was overpowering. the temptation was strong. dopamine feels good, doesn't it?

Spinnaker
Posts: 2216
Joined: Mon Oct 10, 2016 7:25 am
Gender:
Age: 52
United States of America

Re: I've officially transferred

Post by Spinnaker » Thu Jul 11, 2019 4:55 am

Yesnomaybeso

Glad you posted. Sounds so frustrating. Lots of support here.

Are you both single? I
Last edited by Spinnaker on Thu Jul 11, 2019 7:11 am, edited 1 time in total.
“We are tied in a single garment of destiny. What affects one directly affects everyone indirectly”.
Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

L-F
Posts: 2445
Joined: Fri Sep 29, 2017 9:55 am
United States of America

Re: I've officially transferred

Post by L-F » Thu Jul 11, 2019 6:10 am

Go easy on yourself and travel well while on this journey.

It's all a learning curve.
Have conquered limerence. I'm no expert but have learnt enough to know where to look for answers.
Limerence Net helped to heal my heart which led to forgiving my abusers ❤

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David
Site Admin
Posts: 3091
Joined: Wed Feb 19, 2014 8:22 pm
Location: London UK
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Age: 59
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Great Britain

Re: I've officially transferred

Post by David » Thu Jul 11, 2019 7:22 am

L-F wrote:
Thu Jul 11, 2019 6:10 am
Go easy on yourself and travel well while on this journey.
i hope you dont mean travel to the other side of the world to be with the new LO =)) =))
"Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate." - C.G. Jung

For Relationship Coaching help see www.loverelations.co.uk
For Individual Coaching and Mentoring see www.drdavidperl.com

L-F
Posts: 2445
Joined: Fri Sep 29, 2017 9:55 am
United States of America

Re: I've officially transferred

Post by L-F » Thu Jul 11, 2019 9:06 am

=))
I meant the journey thru life in general :D
Have conquered limerence. I'm no expert but have learnt enough to know where to look for answers.
Limerence Net helped to heal my heart which led to forgiving my abusers ❤

Bluebell
Posts: 53
Joined: Wed Jan 30, 2019 9:54 pm
Gender:
Great Britain

Re: I've officially transferred

Post by Bluebell » Thu Jul 11, 2019 10:47 pm

It is scary how easy transference can be. I'm doing it in a small way but I am aware of it, it's like our bodies and minds have had enough and are showing us ways to maybe escape our limerence. Trying to trick us into moving on.
But it's not real, it's like a mirage, just a fantasy built on our own stupid built up ideas.
Please take care of yourself, put yourself first above everything and everyone. Don't rush into anything. Take care x
F 49
LO M 52 10yrs
NC 1yr +
'Our lives are not our own. We are bound to others, past and present, and by each crime and every kindness, we birth our future.'

JupiterTaco
Posts: 3735
Joined: Sun Jun 28, 2015 6:12 pm
United States of America

Re: I've officially transferred

Post by JupiterTaco » Fri Jul 12, 2019 3:05 am

I think to stop the cycle you have to realize that you can give yourself what you keep seeking from others.
"You tell them, we've all got meanness in us. And tell them, we've got good in us too. And the only thing worth living for is the good. That's why we've got to try and pass it on"-Novalee, Where The Heart Is

Yesnomaybeso
Posts: 73
Joined: Tue Dec 18, 2018 12:11 pm
Gender:
Age: 28
Australia

Re: I've officially transferred

Post by Yesnomaybeso » Fri Jul 12, 2019 11:12 pm

Thanks everyone for your supportive replies. This LE is much lower, obviously because it’s somewhat mutual. Yet it brings about another set of problems. It shows how unwilling I am to believing anyone could actually “love” me. I’m hot and cold all the time. I want to hurt them but I also want to help them and show them love. It’s a hot mess and that’s how I’ve always felt in situations like this. I told them before that I looked up the price of flights out of curiosity. Then I felt they weren’t that interested so when they said they loved me I replied... projections of emotions from the past. I can be so damn mean. I just need to heal this.

Yesnomaybeso
Posts: 73
Joined: Tue Dec 18, 2018 12:11 pm
Gender:
Age: 28
Australia

Re: I've officially transferred

Post by Yesnomaybeso » Fri Jul 12, 2019 11:16 pm

Also lol never in my life would I believe that L-F would give me such horrible advice.

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