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Attachment in adults poll

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Which of the following statements do you agree with?

1. "It is relatively easy for me to become emotionally close to others. I am comfortable depending on others and having others depend on me. I don't worry about being alone or others not accepting me."
4
14%
2. "I want to be completely emotionally intimate with others, but I often find that others are reluctant to get as close as I would like", and "I am uncomfortable being without close relationships, but I sometimes worry that others don't value me as much as I value them."
7
25%
3. "I am comfortable without close emotional relationships", "It is important to me to feel independent and self-sufficient", and "I prefer not to depend on others or have others depend on me."
2
7%
4. "I am somewhat uncomfortable getting close to others. I want emotionally close relationships, but I find it difficult to completely trust others, or to depend on them. I sometimes worry that I will be hurt if I allow myself to become too close to other people."
15
54%
 
Total votes: 28

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NoDayDreaming
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Attachment in adults poll

Post by NoDayDreaming » Wed Feb 13, 2019 10:30 pm

lets see if limerence is associated with specific attachment styles. These things can change in life and partners, so think about the time around the LE.

vote first before reading what those styles are called (to prevent bias). full explanation here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attachment_in_adults

THANKS!
I'm limerence free and I'm not afraid of it anymore. I learn something new about myself and life everyday. There is hope and so much more. NC works. Be free, be happy! In retrospect, LE was about the best thing that has happened in my life.

Pattihopeful
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Re: Attachment in adults poll

Post by Pattihopeful » Thu Feb 14, 2019 12:18 pm

This is very insightful and I sure hope more people respond!! I am totally seeing a connection here.

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NoDayDreaming
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Re: Attachment in adults poll

Post by NoDayDreaming » Thu Feb 14, 2019 3:09 pm

actually my hypothesis was style #2 would be over-represented, because this is what I have as well as my LO (who is a LS for another person).
on the other hand, my SO is also #2 and she is super monogamous and not susceptible to LE.
the results so far did not confirm my hypothesis, but i see a pattern there, too. at times of my life, I was #4, too.
Last edited by NoDayDreaming on Thu Feb 14, 2019 3:23 pm, edited 1 time in total.
I'm limerence free and I'm not afraid of it anymore. I learn something new about myself and life everyday. There is hope and so much more. NC works. Be free, be happy! In retrospect, LE was about the best thing that has happened in my life.

mamasita
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Re: Attachment in adults poll

Post by mamasita » Thu Feb 14, 2019 3:16 pm

I am 2, (so I picked it) but can often be 3 as well. Both.

yygyhj
Posts: 18
Joined: Thu Jan 31, 2019 2:11 pm
Afghanistan

Re: Attachment in adults poll

Post by yygyhj » Thu Feb 14, 2019 9:52 pm

I think the texts are not a good indicator for the type. I rather picked 4 than 2, but am rather a type 2 person.
Most ppl will say they are cautious at first.

JupiterTaco
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Re: Attachment in adults poll

Post by JupiterTaco » Mon Feb 18, 2019 6:45 am

I'm mostly number 4 but the right mixture of traits in another person can bring out 1, 2 or 3 in me.
"I can't be held responsible, she fell in love in the first place"-The Freshmen-The Verve Pipe

Icarion
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Re: Attachment in adults poll

Post by Icarion » Mon Feb 18, 2019 6:17 pm

Even thought attachements types are more a spectrum than anything, I'm definitely an anxious-preoccupied myself (type 2 on poll) and suspect LO to be either dismissive or fearful avoidant based on some of our relationship talks (type 3 and 4)

I must say i also thought the anxious type would be over-represented as well with the fear of abandonment and all, but the fearful avoidant type make sense too.

some food for thought :

https://jebkinnison.com/2014/08/04/anxi ... ismissive/
Me: male, 33
LO: female, 32, my best friend and in LTR.
Still in limerence for over 11 years now.


Can't find any solution so meanwhile... a toast to "The time that i lost, the acts that i missed and the search for happiness." ~o)

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