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Small step but BIG deal to me

Open forum ... what's on your mind? Want to vent or lament about your Limerent/Love Object? This is the ideal place.
Charm
Posts: 192
Joined: Sat Apr 28, 2018 4:10 pm
Gender:
Canada

Small step but BIG deal to me

Post by Charm » Thu Sep 13, 2018 12:39 pm

First off -THANK YOU to all of you that have supported me the last little while
See? - little by little it does sink in

So I was supposed to meet LO in a hotel room just outside of town today - said no to that on Monday after all your encouragement and supportive words. Then we adjusted our plan to meet just for lunch and walk and cuddle and kiss
today - I havent seen him for 3 wks and honestly thats really helped so I thought if I met him today I would just go right back to feeling amazing and then brutal again -

it slso helped that I saw T yesterday and she said you’ve come so far the last few weeks - its up to you but think of yourself and be good to yourself ..... so guess what? Even though we confirmed meeting today I sent an early morning msg that I cant - lied which I never have
:-bd
I feel so proud yet very shocked and anxious
Small small step but symbolic for me
I knew we would not be able to see each other now for at least a month because of a family trip for him, work trip for me so it was a big deal!
THANK YOU FORUM FRIENDS
I have never not once put myself first
With limerence you think you are but youre really putting yourself last and LO first
Now to get through today, tmrw and beyond
:ymhug:
Married female 47
LO is older married male
Attempted NC -failed
LE is now 8 months

mamasita
Posts: 630
Joined: Wed Oct 11, 2017 10:27 pm
Location: USA
Gender:
United States of America

Re: Small step but BIG deal to me

Post by mamasita » Thu Sep 13, 2018 2:51 pm

Good job Charm, that IS huge! I've been here for awhile and I can still not say for sure if I could turn down LO if he propositioned me. And you are absolutely right, you just put yourself and your body and mind FIRST! You deserve it!

Maddie
Posts: 498
Joined: Fri Feb 02, 2018 1:09 am
Gender:
United States of America

Re: Small step but BIG deal to me

Post by Maddie » Thu Sep 13, 2018 3:21 pm

Wow! Good job!! Proud of you!! That's encouraging.
39, F
LO, 50 , M
Mental health is an ongoing commitment to reality at all costs-- (M Scott Peck)

Acrobatica
Posts: 362
Joined: Tue Apr 10, 2018 6:02 pm
France

Re: Small step but BIG deal to me

Post by Acrobatica » Thu Sep 13, 2018 4:01 pm

Way to go Charm. You are showing such restraint. I think this is what it must feel like, on some level, to stop using a drug.

You are worth it. Put yourself first! And know that you are worthy of putting yourself first.

User avatar
CrushedSO
Posts: 298
Joined: Sun Nov 19, 2017 1:54 pm
Gender:
Isle of Man

Re: Small step but BIG deal to me

Post by CrushedSO » Thu Sep 13, 2018 4:08 pm

Good job Charm! Baby steps! This a move in the right direction, keep up the good work!

Charm
Posts: 192
Joined: Sat Apr 28, 2018 4:10 pm
Gender:
Canada

Re: Small step but BIG deal to me

Post by Charm » Thu Sep 13, 2018 4:22 pm

Acrobatica wrote:
Thu Sep 13, 2018 4:01 pm
Way to go Charm. You are showing such restraint. I think this is what it must feel like, on some level, to stop using a drug.

You are worth it. Put yourself first! And know that you are worthy of putting yourself first.
TOTALLY!!
I told T yesterday - if I dont go, its like a heroin addict having a hit right in front of them and saying “no thanks”-
its INCREDIBLY hard - as a hard core limerent I fantasized over and over what I would wear, talk
about, how many subjects to cover, where we would kiss, how many times - on and on
And then finally to wake up at the crack of dawn today and say No to that was soooooo hard

Thanks for the support guys
I have read over and over my post last week with the subject of de-coding LO’s reply and it has helped immensely
Married female 47
LO is older married male
Attempted NC -failed
LE is now 8 months

Havb
Posts: 489
Joined: Sat Nov 25, 2017 1:10 am
Saint-Martin (French part)

Re: Small step but BIG deal to me

Post by Havb » Thu Sep 13, 2018 4:30 pm

Good on you Charm! Onwards and upwards !
“Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again. Fail again. Fail better.” -Samuel Beckett

There is always more work to be done.

Natslife
Posts: 49
Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2018 12:24 am
United States of America

Re: Small step but BIG deal to me

Post by Natslife » Thu Sep 13, 2018 6:20 pm

Charm this is HUGE! Good for you! I am sitting here this morning feeling really low, and you have actually inspired me to be stronger, so thank you too! :x

Whiskeyjack
Posts: 51
Joined: Mon Jun 18, 2018 6:25 am
Gender:
Canada

Re: Small step but BIG deal to me

Post by Whiskeyjack » Thu Sep 13, 2018 6:23 pm

Good stuff Charm! Well done. Keep it up.

Pandora
Posts: 82
Joined: Wed Sep 05, 2018 4:29 pm
Canada

Re: Small step but BIG deal to me

Post by Pandora » Thu Sep 13, 2018 7:05 pm

That is awesome Charm! The first step in a string of better decisions.
Desire is a state,
a state of ill repair.
It's ill prepared to cope,
it's ill prepared to care.

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