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Empowerment

What did you learn from your expereince of limerence? How did you change? how did you grow? What were the upsides and downsides?
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NVTS
Posts: 428
Joined: Wed Sep 13, 2017 4:49 pm
Fiji

Empowerment

Post by NVTS » Wed Jan 09, 2019 4:08 pm

Seeing the common theme of empowerment, particularly female empowerment all around me, I’m having an “AHA” moment. Two things have really brought things into focus.

1) the fresh batch of Congress which includes several Females who don’t take shit like AOC.

2) Glenn Close’s speech at the Golden Globes about her mother

I have come to realize that my mother was NEVER given a chance to really grow as a person or figure out who she is. She was thrown into a societal role (as was my father) in a society they didn’t fit into to, thereby creating a dysfunctional and co-dependent relationship.

My wife and I have done a similar thing.

I have always encouraged my DW to learn and figure out what she wanted, and I grew increasingly frustrated as all she seemed to want to do is entertain herself with what I consider drivel.

She is starting to become more assertive and discovering the gifts and experiences life has to offer! I find this attractive as ever!

I’m happy to see that DW is learning that she doesn’t have to sublimate to me or anyone and it would be very sad if she felt that she never accomplished anything in life.

All this because I developed severe “feelings “ for LO nearly 2 years ago, it’s a gift that keeps on giving.
M-47-married
LO- married 48,work colleagues

mamasita
Posts: 804
Joined: Wed Oct 11, 2017 10:27 pm
Location: USA
Gender:
United States of America

Re: Empowerment

Post by mamasita » Wed Jan 09, 2019 4:46 pm

NVTS, that is wonderful news! So glad that you are encouraging your wife to explore her own needs and desires.
It's scary for some of us, who have always felt/been taught that we exist for others' convenience.
Part of my experience with limerence is absolutely wrapped around my role as a woman/daughter/wife and how painful it has been to figure myself out. It never mattered to anyone else, but for once it's got to matter to me. It started for me with figuring out my boundaries and learning how to enforce and explain them without being painted as rude/bitch/catty...whatever.

So excited to see how the new Congress grows and evolves and continues to speak their truth! :-bd

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