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I found THE CURE!

A section to post what worked for you in your healing, recovery and growth. Includes some useful stickies from more experienced members of this forum.
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Penelope
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I found THE CURE!

Post by Penelope » Fri Jun 15, 2018 11:11 pm

I haven’t really told my tale to this forum yet but I have been suffering from a 4 yr long LE stint that goes through distinct cycles due to the infrequent encounters I have with LO (some anticipated, others not). Well fellow limerents, I found relief in an unexpected way.

Surgery! No, not a lobotomy @-), but a planned 4-hr procedure that required general anesthesia and a week on pain meds and muscle relaxers. I get super itchy with opiates so I had to take benadryl on top of all of that.

One week of this completely drugged up state and I am no longer stuck in my OCD-like patterns. I went into surgery in what I consider my obsessing-over-the-obsession stage but came out on the other side clear-minded.

I feel very very happy with SO and life all of a sudden. This may be fleeting but it feels great. I haven’t felt this serene in some time. I even have an anticipated event with LO coming up (his bday party) but I am not obsessing over it.

To be clear, I am NOT condoning drug use as a solution. NO NO NO!! I noticed this change some time after coming out of general anesthesia but a week’s worth of obsessing on REAL itchiness (instead of LE) helped further break this current cycle I was in.

Does general anesthesia have an effect on OCD? I don’t know. I will ask my doc what drug specifically was used. This is where I would normally obsess and spend hours doing online research but I would rather go make jewelry. Further proof that there is something to this.

Peace, P

TheMoon
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Re: I found THE CURE!

Post by TheMoon » Fri Jun 15, 2018 11:29 pm

How interesting! I don't know anything about any of this sort of stuff, but it brings to mind a book I read many years ago about the development of various treatments in psychiatry, and how they noticed that people with serious psychoses seem to improve following an epileptic episode, and how that led to treatments like insulin coma therapy (!) and ECT and so on. So I'm not suggesting that is the same as your experience at all, except maybe they are a bit parallel in that some or all of your experience of the general anaesthetic and the various drugs acted to reboot something in your brain that terminated the destructive loop that limerence had got going (to suddenly switch to an equally random computer analogy). I dunno. It's just a thought, but I like to spot patterns in the world.

Ivanhoe
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Re: I found THE CURE!

Post by Ivanhoe » Fri Jun 15, 2018 11:54 pm

Another thought - perhaps a forced profound focus on something else acts like a Stop It!! Moment or a Whack upside the Head!

For me LE was blindsided by a new girlfriend - and it hasn’t really returned in any form even though we are now broken up.
65 (feel 50); Male

"Grief makes children of us all. Any intellectual difference is destroyed. The wisest know nothing."
- Emerson

Anna
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Joined: Wed Jan 25, 2017 11:15 pm
Canada

Re: I found THE CURE!

Post by Anna » Sat Jun 16, 2018 3:36 am

reading this posting reminded me that I had a small surgical procedure done in November 2016 (when I was at the height of my limerence). Nothing serious, but they anesthetized me. After I woke up, I noticed that for about the following 36 hours my limerence feeling had been completely erased , unfortunately, it did come back after this short reprieve.
I did write a note in my diary that it felt like a 'reset' button had been pushed.
I am still not advocating using opiates to cure LE :))

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NaturalezaMuerta
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Joined: Wed Feb 14, 2018 5:41 am
Mexico

Re: I found THE CURE!

Post by NaturalezaMuerta » Sat Jun 16, 2018 4:38 am

I have taken ketamine for depression and it has done wonders for my overall functioning. I know there are several studies about how hallucinogens can help PTSD and other mental health disorders. Maybe you fall in that category.
They are not responding to you and you are not responding to them. *-:)

Penelope
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Re: I found THE CURE!

Post by Penelope » Sat Jun 16, 2018 5:22 am

Thanks for the replies.

Ivanhoe, you are correct. The distraction of constant itching (when conscious) absolutely helped keep me from wandering back into obsession. I couldn’t use my phone because I was too busy brushing my arms and legs with a comb. Not being tethered to my cell phone may have helped tremendously! The anesthesia DID something to me though. I just felt different after I came out of it.

Moon nailed it. I was REBOOTED, indeed!

I’m not saying I’m cured - I was being sensational with that header, but I am enjoying the reprieve.

I feel that I have to add that I have been on SSRIs on and off for 25+ yrs; on solid, successfully, for the past 10. While not certain, I believe that because of that, I don’t suffer the lows of limerence like most people report here. It doesn’t bring me to tears or make me want to exit the stage of life. I just ruminate, obsess, yearn, obsess, escape, obsess about obsessing and on and on. It has been more of an NRE-turned-existential-OCD-mind-f*ck for me.

Also, I have not disclosed. Perhaps a lot of the suffering part comes through disclosure and consequences of an actual relationship with the LO. Not knowing leaves one in obsessive la la land, a close suburb of Hell.

Penelope
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United States of America

Re: I found THE CURE!

Post by Penelope » Mon Jun 18, 2018 7:32 am

I’ve pinpointed what has been different since my surgery. I am now being forced to find other ways to self-soothe. Limerence has been my go to pacifier but now when I DO try to go there it doesn’t work. My mind no longer recognizes that broken record as one worth playing. It is so strange. THAT was what I noticed immediately after my surgery. Try as I might, the thought of him was oddly void of the typical neuro-chem sensation. I felt frustrated that I couldn’t access that. I still do!!! I have been trying out self talk as a replacement. I talk to myself the way I would to my children. Accentuate the positive things and cut myself slack for the negative.

I’ve been using LO as a mental pacifier for the past 4 yrs. Even through NC periods where I thought I was past it I was still using a mental picture of him at night to help go to sleep. I didn’t know I was using that until it stopped working. It is hard to go to sleep!!

Sara72
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Netherlands

Re: I found THE CURE!

Post by Sara72 » Mon Jun 18, 2018 8:27 am

Sounds like what I experienced when I tried cigarettes without nicotine. :D
F, 46
LO, M, 41
There is liberation in a single acceptance

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