I just went NC with my LO. He is actually a really nice person. There are workplace barriers, and he has no idea of my infatuation. I transferred and left him an email saying that I am very fond of him and will miss working with him. It was pretty ambiguous, but does express some affinity for him. He knows how to contact me if he wishes to. I can tell he isn't attracted to me and I am under no illusion that he will contact me.
I thought it would be good to express some sort of feeling without placing the burden of my emotion on him or make him feel obligated to contact me or reject me or do anything really. Who knows, maybe it will make him feel good about himself.....
Did I do the right thing? Was it creepy? Pathetic? I don't know, maybe. You tell me. I did not want to leave with any regrets. It made me feel a little bit better, but I do anticipate a lot of pain in the days/months ahead.
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What I did instead of FD
Re: What I did instead of FD
Sounds like a good thing to me.
Do you think the LO in your case is a stand in for another loss in your life?
For example, I think the death of my mother and not having a dad around all my life were two big losses that may have been triggered by meeting LO...idk...
Do you think the LO in your case is a stand in for another loss in your life?
For example, I think the death of my mother and not having a dad around all my life were two big losses that may have been triggered by meeting LO...idk...
I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.
F. Scott Fitzgerald
F. Scott Fitzgerald
Re: What I did instead of FD
Selene, I see nothing inappropriate in your email. "very fond" could be interpreted as professionally fond or personally fond depending on how he wants to perceive it.
Re: What I did instead of FD
Maddie, I am so sorry about the loss of your mother. I do not think LO was a stand in for a parent, but I was bullied as a child and boys did not like me until I was maybe 16 or 17. So I do feel like I need external validation from the opposite sex. He is probably a stand in for all the boys I wasn't good enough for.
I lost my father pretty recently and it was far more painful than I ever thought it would be. A parent's love is the strongest there is. I can see how that would be a very powerful trigger for you, as well as others.
I lost my father pretty recently and it was far more painful than I ever thought it would be. A parent's love is the strongest there is. I can see how that would be a very powerful trigger for you, as well as others.
Re: What I did instead of FD
Thanks John, it is always great to have an outside perspective since I cannot see my own situation clearly! 
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