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The most definitive article I've read on Limerence - an interview with the author

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Heart_Open
Posts: 705
Joined: Mon Nov 28, 2016 3:52 pm

Re: The most definitive article I've read on Limerence

Post by Heart_Open »

Butter wrote: Tue Jan 16, 2018 2:14 pm 100% accurate in the symptoms etc. I think some parts are little dangerous though. It says that often LS should confess their feelings towards LO so that it brings about either rejection or reciprocation. I've read on many threads within this forum that this is not a good idea. To be honest, I'm desperate to find out if my LO feels the same about me. Partly because I think rejection could be good for me and help me get over it. The other of course is that we all love to be loved by another desirable person. it seems like a win/win.
I know what you mean about wanting to disclose. Sometimes I think at least I will know either way. But I know , if he rejects me, I will be annoyed at myself for wasting so much time on him. If he confesses mutual feelings, the pair of us are screwed because we wouldn't want to be together anyway. In other words, I don't want to be with him so there is little point me even trying to disclose. But something has to give because I can't see an end to this right now.
Peanut
Posts: 49
Joined: Fri Dec 15, 2017 3:40 am

Re: The most definitive article I've read on Limerence

Post by Peanut »

Heart open. Limerence is not about our object. It is about our wounded past. Work on that and you will find peace. Keep chasing the illusion and you will remain stuck for another ten years. Good luck.
NVTS
Posts: 635
Joined: Wed Sep 13, 2017 4:49 pm
Fiji

Re: The most definitive article I've read on Limerence

Post by NVTS »

@ HO:
Based on my 20+ year LE, I just learned to live with it and move on with my life. Although I don’t think I can ever forget about her; I know that she was/is a poor match for me. I don’t wanna be with her, although I am curious to see what she looks like now. Maybe time hasn’t been good to her and I can take solace in that fact. Scheidenfreud, vengeful thinking, I know very immature.
When all else fails;
READ THE INSTRUCTIONS!
Maddie
Posts: 1515
Joined: Fri Feb 02, 2018 1:09 am
Gender:
United States of America

Re: The most definitive article I've read on Limerence

Post by Maddie »

Great article. I also was surprised that she is 15.
I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.

F. Scott Fitzgerald
David
Site Admin
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Joined: Wed Feb 19, 2014 8:22 pm
Location: London UK
Gender:
Age: 64
Great Britain

Re: The most definitive article I've read on Limerence

Post by David »

I found the author on facebook, she was pleased to read her article is still helping people
Purchase the 24 part video series on overcoming limerence - see https://limerence.thinkific.com/courses/healing-limerence
mamasita
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United States of America

Re: The most definitive article I've read on Limerence

Post by mamasita »

David wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 9:41 pm I found the author on facebook, she was pleased to read her article is still helping people
That is great David!
I always wondered what happened to that smart little girl! Now a grown up, I'm sure! :)
David
Site Admin
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Re: The most definitive article I've read on Limerence

Post by David »

I cant remember how i tracked her down, didn't take much effort, then again us LE's are good at detective work :)) :)) :)) :))

Ive sent her the link to this thread - maybe she will respond one day?
Purchase the 24 part video series on overcoming limerence - see https://limerence.thinkific.com/courses/healing-limerence
mamasita
Posts: 1109
Joined: Wed Oct 11, 2017 10:27 pm
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United States of America

Re: The most definitive article I've read on Limerence

Post by mamasita »

David wrote: Tue Mar 06, 2018 9:50 pm I cant remember how i tracked her down, didn't take much effort, then again us LE's are good at detective work :)) :)) :)) :))

Ive sent her the link to this thread - maybe she will respond one day?
That would be cool! I'd be curious at how she gained so much knowledge on the subject and if she was limerent for others (or the same person) since her blog post. It was that actual post that opened my eyes with the realization that this "thing" I was doing was really a "thing" and I have been calling limerence = love all this time in my 40 years. Opened my eyes which was equally a happy and sad day.

And agreed on your other point, my friends playfully call me the FBI of our friend group. :))
Maddie
Posts: 1515
Joined: Fri Feb 02, 2018 1:09 am
Gender:
United States of America

Re: The most definitive article I've read on Limerence

Post by Maddie »

That's cool. I was impressed with her insight. One thing I keep returning to that she acknowledged--is that there was no way to "win" this thing...in the way I wanted to win. It is so vague and unfamiliar to me to face my pain. The best I can do so far is feel those intense feelings without reacting. I'm shocked how quickly they pass sometimes. The LE is a bit better since NC. Still wish to see him sometime. Guess that's normal. Thankful for you all!

And yes, I too am excellent at tracking down ppl =))
I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start all over again.

F. Scott Fitzgerald
David
Site Admin
Posts: 3859
Joined: Wed Feb 19, 2014 8:22 pm
Location: London UK
Gender:
Age: 64
Great Britain

Re: The most definitive article I've read on Limerence

Post by David »

I've had some interesting dialogue with the author. She's looked at this site and found it fascinating. She's also grateful people are finding her article useful.
Purchase the 24 part video series on overcoming limerence - see https://limerence.thinkific.com/courses/healing-limerence
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