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The capacity to be alone

Perhaps there is light at the end of the tunnel. Or maybe life is never the same after limerence. Read how others have coped with limerence in the longer term. Please feel free to post your own accounts of journeying through limerence.
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kenophobia
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The capacity to be alone

Post by kenophobia » Sun Dec 17, 2017 1:29 pm

The capacity to be alone...
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David
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Re: The capacity to be alone

Post by David » Sun Dec 17, 2017 4:31 pm

nice quote, feels like a mountain to climb at times
"Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate." - C.G. Jung

For Professional Coaching / Therapy see http://loverelations.co.uk/limerence

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MrSpock
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Re: The capacity to be alone

Post by MrSpock » Sun Dec 17, 2017 6:48 pm

I loved it!

Peanut
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Re: The capacity to be alone

Post by Peanut » Sun Dec 17, 2017 7:00 pm

Love love love


"We are all alone, born alone, die alone, and—in spite of True Romance magazines—we shall all someday look back on our lives and see that, in spite of our company, we were alone the whole way. I do not say lonely—at least, not all the time—but essentially, and finally, alone. This is what makes your self-respect so important, and I don't see how you can respect yourself if you must look in the hearts and minds of others for your happiness."
Hunter S. Thompson

Endgame
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Re: The capacity to be alone

Post by Endgame » Sun Dec 17, 2017 8:03 pm

Funny how we admire strengths or achievements in others without acknowledging the full weight of our own undertakings.

As David says...a mountain to climb.

I perhaps denied myself the chance to ever fully achieve this when I cheated by having kids for exactly that purpose. Not a 'quick fix' by any means....but all wrapped up in the same rubix. And have thought as I'd got older I have achieved it...but when it comes to staring into the void, I see I'm just as scared of it as ever. And therefore, as the quote states...incapable of fully giving back. (I typed 'ever' initially then realised that's a self projection in itself).

Good luck with the Aloneness AKA learning to love. Yourself and others. There's a whole lot of good that can be reflected in that abyss...but god knows; I think you're brave for confronting it.

Perhaps we'll see a renamed Kenophobia in 2018, ha.

Just as a side note to the Hunter S Thompson quote, Peanut...I personally think self respect and self actualization go hand in hand. And if your self awareness teaches you that you are a herd (or pair) animal, there is nothing wrong with that at all. I don't believe that we do all die alone. The last breath may ultimately be our responsibility, but whether it is shared, supported, understood, SEEN....makes all the difference. It's whether you cling to your companion/s, suffocate them, cannot let them exist as identities independent of you. That's when there's an issue. Or when you actually would be better alone but society has conditioned you to think you shouldn't be, so you live in a limbo land never really knowing who you are or where you belong.

JohnDeux
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Re: The capacity to be alone

Post by JohnDeux » Mon Dec 18, 2017 1:03 am

Nice quote.....feels right.
"Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain...."~ The Wizard of Oz

ReeledIn
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Re: The capacity to be alone

Post by ReeledIn » Fri Dec 29, 2017 4:40 am

This feels like two (2) Mount Everests - and then some - for me.

Working on it in T.
47yo female, LO/ex PA partner is 54, single dad & coworker
Been with SO, age 51, since 1998
LE since June 2016

For my story if interested:
http://limerence.net/forum/viewtopic.php?f=4&t=3738

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