limerence.net

And investing energy in trying to understand their behavior just distracts us from the heavy lifting we have to do internally to heal the hurt part within ourselves. I’m not saying one replaces the other by any means. The heavy lifting has to happen, I agree and I’m doing it. My point was that I do...

Even if you ask you might not get the truth HMP. It depends how honest and vulnerable she wishes to be, what the consequences of her honesty would be etc. I’m not looking for proof beyond doubt, we’ll never get there, but if I can try to understand things from her point of view, at least to some deg...

But of course I do wonder what happened, why she didn’t fight for the friendship. Take time to look into projections you might find your answer there. That’s what I’ve been doing these last 4 months of NC. Whilst I get the “it’s about you” mantra, it’s not 100% about me. It’s not like she works in ...

Well I ended it abruptly, told her we were done and went NC. So it’s not like she’s chosen to see them instead of me as such. But of course I do wonder what happened, why she didn’t fight for the friendship.

Yes lots of similarities HL. Workplace LEs seem very common, which makes sense given the proximity we have with a potential LO and the uncertainty created by the fear of expressing any feeling. For me though it’s my first workplace LE despite nearly 20 years in an office now. So I think there were a...

I’m doing OK HMP, thanks. It’s 4 weeks since LO and I swapped a couple of texts, and whilst I still catch myself ruminating on them, and there is a still a pang of pain at how she seems to have moved on, I can see that it was a useful exercise for me. I’m no longer seeing LO as being wounded by me g...

Better place certainly. I’m still analyzing her last texts in my mind too much though. It was a firm rejection by someone who is very immature and thinks very black and white - i.e. she has a new boyfriend, no place for me anymore. That’s fine, it’s what I need to get over this. Not having new inter...

interesting how MF projected the feelings toward his previous GF into the current LO. 20 years between them - shows how this stuff stays with you, despite another long-term ex, a few other girls and 10 years of happy marriage in between. The ex was 19 when we broke up and LO was the same when this ...

Thanks for the probing questions LF, I appreciate it. Why was I angry? I’d put so much time, effort, thought, even my reputation at home and work into this girl and I felt she threw it all back in my face. I felt there was a bond, attraction between us that we both understood and so felt there was a...

https://youtu.be/FNvB6afXQZw Always been a tear jerker, and a classic breakup song but I heard it today for the first time in a long time and it seemed so apt after the last few days. =(( Me and LO are done now for sure: “I won't kill myself, trying to stay in your life / I got no distance left to r...